What’s the deal with Very Demure Very Mindful on Tiktok? Trend explained and how to do it

• See how I’m writing these bullet points. 
• Very demure. 
• Very mindful. 
• Very cutesy. 

From the outside looking in, TikTok can feel a bit like a series of incomprehensible inside jokes and code in need of a cipher to crack. But thankfully that is where I come in, bringing you a handy explanation of the latest trend your kids or younger relatives may be yapping about. 

See how I am taking the time to write this article, detailing a trend you may be nebulously aware of and helping you to understand it further. Very mindful, very cutesy, very demure. 

The latest break out on TikTok is the brainchild of a trans influencer on the social media platform. Jools Lebron has been using her now signature catchphrase for a while, but it has really caught on with a wider audience - and once you start saying it yourself, you might not be able to stop. 

What is the ‘Very Demure, Very Mindful’ trend? 

The latest TikTok hyperfixation has been sparked by self-confessed ‘fierce diva’ Jools Lebron, who has over 1.3 million followers on the platform. She started to ‘reclaim’ the word demure for the 21st century. 

In her videos, Jools gives her viewers advice on how to be “mindful” and “demure” in their everyday life - whether at work or just out and about. In one clip, for example, she explains how to have a ‘demure drink’ at the airport. 

She tells her followers: “See how I am waiting for my plane, I do a nice soda. I don’t get drunk like these other girls. I’m very cutesy with it, I do a nice Sprite.” 

What does demure actually mean? 

This is a bit of a throwback - and by a bit, I mean a huge throwback, like throwing it back to Jane Austen. It might be one of those words that you’ve stumbled across in a book or seen elsewhere and while you can’t exactly put a finger on the exact definition beyond a nebulous sense of its vibe. 

But basically it is rooted in the concept of modesty, back from the days where showing off your ankles was considered utterly scandalous (how ever did middle aged men cope without ripping off their shirts as soon as the temperature hit 15C). To be demure, according to Cambridge Dictionary, is to be ‘quiet and well behaved’ (especially of women). 

It was often used in reference to a way of dressing, to avoid the encouraging of sexual attraction in others. The word modesty comes from the Latin term ‘modestus’ which means 'keeping within measure'. 

But as the wheel of time turns and ages come to pass, the meanings of words can also shift. And in TikTok user Jools Lebron, we have started to see a shift in the use of ‘demure’, revamping it for the 21st century. 

How can you join in with the trend? 

Jools Lebron might have been the one to start using her ‘fierce’ catchphrase ‘very demure, very mindful’, but it has soon caught on with TikTok users (and beyond). And if your kids want to take part, all they need to do is ape the original style of Jools videos. 

The key part is starting the video by saying ‘See how I…’ and then describe the way they are being ‘mindful’, ‘cutesy’ and ‘demure’. An example from another user comes from SatayReads, who shows her viewers how she is reading a hardcover book with the dust jacket off - it should be embedded below, watch it for yourself. 

Is that it? 

Unlike other TikTok trends, you and your kids won’t have to learn any dance steps or moves before filming the clip. See how I am not stealing any dance routines from the Culture for views, very demure, very mindful. 

Have your kids started using the term demure recently? Share your experiences with our tech writer by emailing [email protected].